Yep, it’s true, it’s all peaches and roses and smiles and butterfly kisses all the time . . . if you’re watching the young and the restless or any midday telemovie or little house on the prairie or if you have one of those mothers groups . . . an olympic meet mothers group.
Look. For some people it is alright, let that be said.
For some people, their bubs/kids quietly and lovingly coo and goo and smile and giggle as you hold them and when you place them on the floor they happily amuse themselves with a piece of fluff or by admiring the ceiling. And on the odd occasion they murmur a quiet ‘waaa?’ it passes as quickly as it came.
Let it also be said, for most people it’s not like that. And for these people they need to spend all of their time playing the role of genius ninja woman (or man) plotting the next move to appease the wriggling, whingeing, head banging, hammering, hitting, yelling, cat tail yanking, pj pant hanging, and biting. And let me be clear, this is more than likely not a child without discipline or boundaries or ‘no’ or ‘don’t’ this is just a typical child finding their way in the world, testing the boundaries, learning.
So to any mothers walking around the house with a pint sized whinge-box who pulls your pants down if you stop, please know that it is not abnormal, in fact it is very common for kids not to be as ‘perfect’ as those in your mothers group or to be as well behaved as the glares you receive in the mall suggest they should be. It’s normal – as normal is fact as any other child who sits cooperatively is. They are finding their way. Their brain is still developing. And they are moulding their personality and character by testing the boundaries. In fact you’ve probably got a real smarty on your hands.
It is also not abnormal for you to be occasionally frustrated by it. This little being who is whingeing for a hug and when you give it, wriggle and writhe until you put them down, who want the food you’re eating and promptly spit it on the floor or smoosh it into your fresh clothes when they get it, who know they are not to pull on that there door handle and continue to do so with a devilish grin, is just learning. They long to know more and, to their credit, they are figuring it out (they are figuring you out) the only way they and their personality know how.
It took me a while to realise it, but the way they are going about it is just their inert nature and you can’t change that. Some may say I’m naive for expecting otherwise or even writing this post. I like to think of it as optimistic and peaceful.
I often remind myself of this as I am walking around the house for the 500th time trying to avoid being dacked, bitten, tripped and going mad from the whinge-box.